Dear Reader,
How are you today? I’m feeling a little pissy about my most recent flight experience.
I've been flying basically all my life. Since I was two I believe. Mostly domestic back and forth between family members but in the past few years lots of international. Recently I just came back from a month long trip to Tokyo(another blog post you can read after this one), and my flight experience both going and coming back was just absolutely atrocious. No names will be changed for privacy because fuck you Southwest. Now after these experiences I decided it was time to share a few of my personal tips and suggestions for all new fliers whether you're international or domestic.
1. OOTD
You're not a Victoria Secret model alright (unless you are in which case good for you boo) ditch the high heels, the stilettos, the wedges, more recently the platform sneakers, the skimpy little two piece shorts and crop top or crop top and sweats. Planes are COLD hunty and soon you will be too, exposing all that skin. The only shoes you need on your flight are some slides or sneakers so old you haven't retied the laces in years(you know which pair I mean).
As for the actual clothing, my favorite worn down hoodie and broke in sweats are usually my go to. Basically anything with an elastic waist band is my go to. For these long international flights you don’t want anything squeezing or pinching you. Sitting in a cramped chair for 13 hours is already uncomfortable enough. For those of you traveling domestic, dress for whatever you’re doing when you get off the flight. And if you don’t want to wear it on the plane throw it in a bag boo.
2. Achoo!
The amount of germs on a plane. Bro. No. Always always alwaaaaysss for the sake of your health carry some wipes with you. Grab some women or men shower wipes off amazon-I would recommend GoodWipes brand. They are hypoallergenic, leave no sticky residue and they even have different scents. I promise you, when you step off that 13 hour flight either for a connection or because you’ve arrived when you use those in the bathroom you’ll feel positively refreshed.
Bring some antibiotic wipes for the pull down trays. Have you ever seen how sticky they are? It’s a no from me. Also here’s an insider tip, never get drinks with ice in them on planes. They don’t clean the ice trays simply because they don’t have time with back to back flights all the time. What do you not have time for? Disease! So just don’t do it. Warm drinks are better for digestion anyways.
3. Layovers
Good god layovers. Even when you think you have all the time in the world for things to go wrong and for you to handle them, you don’t. I once had a 13 hour layover. 13 HOURS. And I still managed to miss my flight! Kms. Tip number one! Find some kind of blueprint or layout of the airport you’re arriving in and figure out where everything is a week before your departure date. Map out the route you need to take from gate to gate, security and to wherever your pick up spot is.
Some airports require you to shuttle between gates(LAX) because they’re so massive. Finding the shuttle can be a real bitch sometimes. Landing and already knowing exactly where you need to go is so much better than scrambling around trying to figure it out. Especially if it’s in a country whose language you’re not proficient in. They may speak your home language, they may not. Don’t take that chance and know where you’re going.
Tip number two! Depending on length of layover have layover cash in that country’s currency. Avoid those credit card and international debit card fees. There’s no need to starve even if the layover is just an hour. Which I would never recommend.
Final tip! Unless you’re traveling domestic(and even then sometimes I just like to be safe), always have layovers minimum two hours or more. You never know you never know you never know you never know YOU NEVER KNOW. I had a layover that was an hour flying domestic. But the first flight was delayed by an hour due to slow luggage loading so when I reached the layover I had missed the connecting flight. Again. Fuck you Southwest.
4. Bitch I’m Bored
What to do on planes is something no one ever really talks about. They just say sleep. Well girl. What if, a bitch is too cold to sleep, the way planes be blasting the hell out of AC. Or what if, perhaps, sitting upright, in a foot of space, where I can’t even bend my elbow to the side or I’ll hit the bitter white lady next to me is a bit of a hindrance to finding that blissful sleep. So whilst sleep evades you what else can grab your attention?
Plentyyyy of things. Reading. Writing. Drawing. The amount of times I’ve busted out a sketchbook and just chilled drawing my own hand over and over in different poses. You don’t have to be good at drawing. Coloring books are good too and sooo therapeutic trust me. You can do a physical one or if you want to save space, download a coloring book app onto your phone!
If you have an iPad, download all your fave movies and Netflix shows or amazon prime shows.(Don’t forget a portable charger for that) If you have a laptop download fave movies or vine compilations from YouTube. The kind of stuff you watch on your phone when you’re lying in bed after you told yourself three hours ago you were going to sleep. If you don’t have space, put it all on a flash drive and then plug in the flash drive when you’re on the plane.
Lastlyyy music my friend music. Download that Spotify playlist that brings you peace and make the hours zoom by while you chill to your fave tracks.
5. Fees
Mmph. Bitter. I will steady be bitter about missed flight fees. How are you going to charge me a fee for a flight I missed but you’re not refunding me. Extra. So not only are you taking my money for the flight reservation you’re now charging me for the ghost in my spot on the plane. Goodbye. The flight I missed after the 13 hour layover was on Korean Air from Seoul to Tokyo. The no show fee was $150. Luckily I had my credit card or else I was effectively screwed.
Know. The. Fees. Know the fees for no shows for the airlines you’re in. Know the fees of luggage being overweight or adding a second or third. Some airlines only give you one luggage free. Some give you no luggage free it’s $20 per luggage. Don’t act like you won’t shop wherever you’re going. Souvenirs are heavy. Know the fees of cancellation or booking new flights should you miss a layover or want to stay longer wherever you’re going.
6. Insurance
You didn’t spend all that money just to lose it to weather conditions. Insure your flight! Insure your luggage! Airlines are not that careful and frankly don’t care that much about each individual customer. You ever seen how they be flinging your luggage into the plane? It’s an anger therapy session down there. In the case of lost luggage or delayed/cancelled flights, insurance is what saves the day. Pay now so you don’t have to pay even more later.
Alright folks that’s all I’ve got for now. Basically just be smart, be clean, be safe. Happy travels!
Wishing you peace,
Love Maia